The ARIZONA POLICE ASSOSHEATION has just ENDORSED Gina Swoboda for Secretay of State because I personally commanded them to do it from the seat of my very beautiful, highly armored golf cart! The corrupt media is crying, they say I was "detained" and "physically wrestling" with a Phoenix fire hydrant. WRONG! I was conducting a brilliant, highly classified inspection of the local Wendy’s dumpster. The officers—very strong men, big men, with tears running down their faces—said, "Sir, nobody salvages raw frostings with such dignity, please let us endorse Gina for you." I said, "Fine, she has very neat handwriting and she never asks why the campaign shredder is constantly smoking." A massive, historic victory for law and order!